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Grief – Saying Goodbye to a Wonderful Grandmother

Grief and Saying goodbye to a wonderful Grandmother

Names have not been changed as this blog is about saying goodbye to my a wonderful grandmother (pictured) and dealing with grief.

10 days ago my beautiful grandmother aged 99 fell asleep. She had an amazing life and was and will continue to be my inspiration. She was full of energy and had a great zest for life.  She had a wicked sense of humour. She lived life to the full, just a few weeks ago she was celebrated her 99th birthday with  the family and a glass of wine.

I received the phone call from my Aunt to say she had passed away peacefully in her bed and one of my uncle’s had been with her. She had been poorly for some months and whilst the news had been expected it didn’t make it easier to deal with.

During the last week I’ve experienced many emotions, a mixture of sadness and happiness recalling happy childhood memories, playing cricket in the garden with my cousins.  Christmas mornings where the whole family would gather to exchange presents. This also stirred up memories of both my parents that have also passed away over the years. Enter double whammy of grief.

It’s been 10 days since my Grandmother passed away and I have reflected how whilst I’ve been sad and weepy it hasn’t upset me as much as I thought it might. I started to ask myself why.

The answer was very clear. Nothing compared to the pain I felt when my Dad had been diagnosed with brain cancer during my last year of studying homeopathy in 2004. He had just turned 65 and had never been ill in his life.

I can still recall that phone call when he had been diagnosed and the feeling of complete and utter shock. The first remedy I took for this feeling was Arnica. Not many people realise but Arnica is an excellent remedy for shock.   I cried on and off for weeks and my homeopath prescribed me with Pulsatilla. My father died 9 months later and my sadness continued. It took me a very long time to come to terms with it but I continued to see my homeopath for support.

Grief
There are many stages of the grieving process and it is very different for all of us.   There is no time limit as to how long it will take for us to feel better. A few years later I also lost my Mum and again that was a very difficult time for me and once again homeopathic remedies came to the rescue.

My Grandmother’s funeral will be soon and whilst I don’t feel I need anything at the moment, I am sure I will take the homeopathic remedy Ignatia with me, especially as it is an excellent remedy for that “lump in the throat” and “choked up” feeling.

Grieving is never easy and we all go through it very differently. One thing is very important and that is we should allow ourselves to feel the emotions, which can vary from sadness, anger, guilt etc. If you experiencing a similar situation and after some time you are struggling to cope or are finding it difficult to move forward please feel free to contact me to see how I can help you with homeopathy.  I offer a free 15 minute consult.

Losing someone we love

cherub

At some point during our lives it is inevitable that we will lose people we love.  For some of us that will be much earlier and far too soon, but what ever age we are nothing can ever prepare us.  I consider myself quite lucky in that I didn’t suffer any real loss until the death of my father 11 years ago. It did however come as a huge shock to me especially as he was still relatively young, 65 years and I was heartbroken. I do however, know people who lost parents at very young ages, or worse still parents who have lost their children.

Everyone tells us that there are five stages of grief which we all experience when we lose someone we love very much and these stages can happen in any order and there are no rules as to when we will experience these feelings, which are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. It is a gradual healing process and one not to be rushed.

We all deal with our emotions very differently so when we are going through a period of grief it is hardly surprising we can feel isolated and alone, especially when the world seems to be carrying on just as it did before.

As time goes by the grieving should become easier and we can begin to recall the good times and think about the person with fond and happy thoughts. For some, this doesn’t always happen and the problem starts if we get stuck in the grieving process and don’t deal and address the emotions we are experiencing. It has been known for some people to hold onto their grief for many years and this can have a detrimental affect on long-term health.

If you suspect you might be holding on to grief in any way then please contact me. Using homeopathy, I work with you to heal form within using a gentle, non-toxic, chemical free and safe form of medicine.